Friday, December 10, 2004


I'm feeling utterly uninspired today, but I simply cannot leave you for the weekend with the echos of my unfulfilled concupiscence set forth in yesterday's post. The plans on the weekend horizon are promising, so I promise to give you juicy oysters on Monday. I love when chefs refer to juicy peices of turkey meat that you pull off the bird as oysters (which I am not sure actually happens or if it's in my imagination, it's still nice). Moving along,

Devon reminded me that I love Mortal Kombat and Tekken 2. Which further reminds me that I take a whole hearted pleasure specifically in making video game characters move in innane ways. I love making Mario walk into a wall and watch him as he keeps trying to walk forward when common sense dictates that he is simply not going to get anywhere. And back to Mortal Kombat, I loved making the oh so cool Johnny Cage do splits over and over. He'd be in his tough battle stance, yet under my control his fists of fury are rendered utterly useless as I make him do split after split, up and down. Yes, an impertinent milktoast like myself who enjoys the likes of Nietzsche and who can properly pronounce Goethe (Guurtah) finds great pleasure in watching Johnny Cage do splits over and over again.

I interrupt this posting to give you some useful information

The Blue on this chart represents the amount of time that I think about doing Colin Farrell. The Red, which represents all of my leftover time, is consumed by contruction paper and glue crafts in which I make greeting cards and collages for my parents to put up on the fridge.

Speaking on the phone with my dad today, I remembered my Dad's search for boiled peanuts. We drove to Florida when I was young, I think in 5th grade. And he pulled off the highway cause he saw some cardboard sign for boiled peanuts. He insisted it was a regional specialty and that it would be really "neat" to try them. So here we are, cooped up kids in our crappy pontiac with no A.C. and hot hot heat, and dad decided we need boiled peanuts. To which we moan and whine, "Ew, boiled peanuts", and "No dad, we want to go to Disney World, when are we going to get to Disney World" and "we want to play" and "Why isn't mom driving". My mother concurs. But no. Dad insists we need to try this regional specialty. So all I remember is getting off this exit, in that crappy let me out of the goddamn car mode, and there's no bioled peanuts. There's weird shacks made out of scrap metal and a whole lot of nothing in the middle of nowhere Florida. Long story short I think he put a what is in my memory a few hours to get these peanuts. Verdict- "Not bad." Years later I had them in Florida when I visited Brian. They're pretty good. Not drive all over the damn place in the hot heat good. But good.

My dad's quirky. To an extent you could never fathom in a million years. Today we laughed because he found this sign I stole years ago from a park in LBI that says "No Dogs Allowed in Park". We stole it cause of some memory we had with the sign (my friends and I, not my parents). I had stolen this other funny sign from this park in my home town (Imagination Station) and my mom found it and came with me to take it back where it came from. So my dad was about to take the No Dogs sign back to the park in my town cause he thought it was from there (he's cleaning outthe garage). And he just started laughing really hard and thought maybe he should bring the sign there anyway and wait with his digital camera to take pictures of all the pissed off people who try to bring their dogs to the park cause they are normally allowed to. I'm pretty sure he's not going to do that. I asked him to keep the sign for me. It will have a good home some day.

Amusing Johnny Depp.

Sometimes I just wish for Normal Reproduction.

This will be good (for Justin, a fan of the novel).

PS- Friends, on the subject of New Years Eve, everyone is all "What are you doin New Years" and I am all, "No idea". Anybody got ideas, suggestions?

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