Friday, March 04, 2005

Stay Away Stupid Lady.

Hey, Fuck you lady! Go back to being cool on surf boards.

So I watched Win a Date With Tad Hamilton, a stupid and crappy but entertaining movie. It got me thinking of two things. Kate Bosworth's character. I hate that character more than anything on this earth. She's beautiful and nice. That's it. And that's really all that's needed to satisfy the tastes of men great and small. But I hate men who go for that. All she needs to be is pretty and nice. Non-threatening, no opinions, no taste, no job or interesting talents, hobbies, or, I don't know- substance. Nope, no substance necessary. And if she does have a job or go to school, it pleases the guy cause that's his way of telling himself that there's more to her, even when there isn't.

The perfect woman for the spineless male, or even just the modern "I like women as tools and not as people" guy, is the substanceless chick. She is ideal because she's not an individual human being with her own mind and her own life- nope. She's moldable and maleable to whatever he wants to do with his life. Yep. She'll pack up and move about the country with you for your job, she'll never argue her point of view too fervently. She's generally impartial because she believes that everything is relative and to each his own. Who cares what taste in music or movies she has. She'll soon adopt the taste of her boyfriend, and there he's got his charming little dicksucker by his side. I hate these women. They define themselves by their boyfriends. And the fact that there exist women who have no real substance and are just plain pretty and nice just throws everything off for the rest of us. And these women exist because they are raised in a world that praises "nice" girls.

I mean fuck. Every girl should be nice. Every person should be nice and respectful and courteous. I'm nice to people. I'm friendly. But I don't think in a million years I would be called a "nice" girl. Why? Maybe because I do my own thing, use dirty words, have my own life, and party like a whore on coke. Oh, and that much dreaded not needing a man to be happy. Any boyfriend I have had, I never needed. I wanted. And I've come across these guys that want to be needed, worshiped, looked up to- you know, the kind that date younger, more fragile girls. I once dated a guy who just loved ugly chicks or chicks with issues such as abuse. Yeah, seriously. He went for these girls because he easily became the center of their universes in seconds. He was handsome, smart, charming. These girls had never had a guy like him. And he loved being worshiped. The whole mutual respect thing we had going just wasn't enough for the boy.

Ugh I just hate that movie character cause so many girls see that and try to emulate it. Ever notice that that is exactly what "the most popular" girl in school is like? Yeah and that's on the outside. On the inside she's either dumb as fuck so the act isn't a problem. Or she's an emotionally dwarfed basketcase who has no clue about her own, I dunno, Id. She has no Id.

The moral of the story is that I am pissed that guys like these kind of chicks cause they don't really like them as whole people. They like them like they like a product- it does what they want, they consume it. It's there to please them. It gets them off and makes them feel loved. It pisses me off that so many guys don't want anything more than that. Lord knows I want more than that from guys.

Let's move over here for a second, into happy thought land.
Ok here we are. Bitterness free reflection.

ah yes . . . everyone loves making out . . .

Just seeing people hook up on tv or in movies brings me back to some of my happiest memories. Some of the awesomest times in my life are those moments with boys that I've had over the years. Anytime I am reminded of those long summer nights, those afternoons on some boy's couch, or that time in that other boy's car- what ever it was, it makes me smile. I think back to high school a lot, because it wasn't really that long ago, and because that's the last time, before now, that I was really single for a while. I was single for all of high school. That's four years of fun single boy memories. Other than that, I only had fun with other boys in in-between times cause during college I was involved in an on-again-off-again here and there.

Anyhow, nothing beats those times. And I am starting to love it again, but it's very different now. It's safe to say I am boy crazy. They are so much fun. Getting those stupid little smiles out of them, making them laugh, seeing their world. And to me, there is nothing sexier and more exciting then when you get to see a boy in their natural habitat. I loved (still love) going to boys' rooms. When they're in there in their boxer shorts, in their messy beds with all the articles of their daily life strewn across the room- I don't know- I just love seeing it. I see a boy's room and I instantly start thinking dirty thoughts about him- I mean if I find him attractive I do. I look at that bed and think, aha, this is where that boy has his alone time. This is where the "magic" happens. Those are the CDs he listens to to keep himself company, and that's the book he reads. I just love those little details about someone's life. It seems so secret. Yet when you get to go in their room it's such a window into their sexy little world. Yeah, the boring details are sexy to me. Men in their running pants and t-shirts are sexy to me. I guess that's a little obvious. Cause it reminds me of seeing them in and out of bed.

Mmm, back to those happy thoughts. Long summer nights. Yes those are great. Sneaking out of the house. Steamy car windows. Park benches, lifeguard chairs, kissing in the rain, that time in that elevator cause we just couldn't wait to get home . . . those goodnights where you leave with a smile on your face cause you just can't wait till next time. Yeah, I'm guilty of putting boys on a pedestal for as long as they are in my sight. And vow to myself and truly believe that the very next one is just the awesomest thing ever. Just that image of a man and a woman on a couch, with maybe some kind of undershirt on, cause top layers have been removed, and you know what's happening next. The anticipated squirming about, some hot hot kissing action, oh the very best moment is before the kiss when you get all scared about whether or not its ok to do it. And the torturously great dry humping.

I think that's all I want sometimes. Just a lot of that. The fun early on times you share with a person where you really get excited for their phone calls and all. It's so different in the city environment though. There's no cars and no getting in his car. You don't really hang out at apartments or houses right away, and the as the boys get older they start wearing fancy pants and putting gel in their hair. And dating becomes more like scheduled appointments for me and them cause single twenty-something New Yorkers are by nature busy little animals. But whatever. I still get excited at boys in sweatpants or boxers and their messy morning hair. And nothing beats the novelty of being in a car with em cause it will call right back to those good ol days. Ahh. Memories of getting some . . .

Meanwhile, I'm excited about Melinda and Melinda. A good Woody Allen film again! Thank god, cause with his last few I thought his glory days were way over. No doubt Will Ferrel, who has surprised me with the strength of his post-SNL career, has a lot to do with the reenergizing of Allen's work.

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