Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Keep Your Eye On the Prize, Girlfriend.


Sometime's there just aren't enough balls. That's when you have to take things into your own hands. So if you're playing tennis, and the balls have bounced away, and there's a hot sweaty man around, get him on the ground and start making out with him. Now while you may think that you can get more balls by grabbing at his testes, don't be so vulgar and childish. Indeed I am not speaking of those balls. Regardless, if you don't know the man well he may not be so trusting as to let you just up and at his balls. Surely you could get at them some how but that kind of hand ball intimacy may need to be based off of a solid foundation of trust. Testes are very sensitive and indeed a man may feel as though he's got his life in your hands. Do not let yourself be distracted by desires to go for his nut gold regardless of how tempted you are. You are losing site of your goal. You want more balls. Tennis balls, and those ones on the ground are no good for whatever reason. You're making out with him because he is a man and you are a woman and you are a lazy one at that and don't make no money cause women shouldn't be working, they should be in the kitchen makin lunchboxes, so you need to steal his money by a quick ass/wallet grab so you can go buy more balls. Or, if you're not a thief, alas no worry, no moral barriers will stand in the way of your achievement of said balls. Indeed you can and you will succeed. I have been with a man or two in my day, and let me let you in on a little sexy tip I learned along the way: deliver a swift prod in the chode with your right forefinger. He will dispense tennis balls in caccoon like form that will develop into full grown tennis balls in approximately 5-8 days. Moving on,

The Gap commercial asked me what my favorite song is. I think it's Epic from Faith No More. Songs are great - am I right or am I right, c'mon people!
Today's songs on the ipod getting the most play are:
Orenda Fink "Leave it All"
Kanye West "Gold Digger" and "Diamonds from Sierra Lione"
Jimmy Eat World (who has a new 5 song EP on itunes) "Game of Pricks"
Shakira "Lo Imprescindible"
Elvis "Any Way You Want Me"
Portishead "It's a Fire"

Buy tickets to Beer on the Pier 2 before they runsout!

I slept in Astoria last night. On purpose.
And the night before that I had this dream that all of my viens had turned dark bright purple and you could see them through my skin all over my body.


One of the Beautiful Images at ArtWingNY

Sundays are MTV reality show day. I treasure them, as I treasure that 70s house. MTV does reality best.

If you recently bought a computer or ipod (like myself) you're missing out. You could've gotten it in color instead . . . At least I know there's an enticing way to waste an extra hundred here and there one day when I have it to waste.

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