Thursday, November 30, 2006


These goddamned Oreos I am eating have no flavor. It's akin to a sexy person having no genitals. I goddamn hate it.

I wrote a press release today and there's an error. A stupid goddamned typo error. ARG. It's sent out into the place it goes. I can't get it back! Farts. I hope nobody notices and hates me.

How can one woman so obviously do this on purpose? And how can she get it so hair free with not one little red irritation? Are there some kind of kick ass lasers out there that the rich and famous get up in their snatchtopias?

I like Pamela Anderson. Kid Rock is a loser. I hope she shoves him into something unpleasant like cut open dead animals. She's cool and I liked her in Borat and V.I.P. and her articles in Jane. People assume she sucks cause she's hot and has tits like an amazing magical rhinocerous who has breast implants. But they are wrong. She's got personality and she seems pretty darn cool. I pray for Ms. Anderson to try doing it with someone cool and not nasty like her past lovers. I like bad boys too and if I were her I'd try doing it with both really super hot dudes and also boyfriend material boys. Is she crazy or do just douchebags try to date her? Oh fuck I've just put too much thought into someone I don't know. I need to stop.

And continue on with these shitty cookies.

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